First, it was my final year project grade at Singapore Polytechnic.
Now, it's my first full-time job at Best World International.
It's really pissing off to see and/or hear myself having "poor performance" in other people's eyes, when I know I can do so much more, or maybe have done so much. I don't think it's my fault when I'm sick, under the weather or having compassionate leaves. I can't tell when I'm going to fall sick, I can't tell when I'm going to fall asleep because of it, and I can't tell when someone dies.
And all 'cause of that, people say "I'm just not good enough".
If I'm going to get sacked from this company, I'm not going to find another job. By hook or by crook, I'm going back to study! I'm really tired of getting shot at the back of my head, and making myself feel so damn inferior to many other people, who may or may not be any better than me.
P.S I just need someone to assure me that everything is going to be okay, 'cause it sure doesn't seem like it is. Even my love life might just be going for topsy-turvy-ness.
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